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11 KiB
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1 line
11 KiB
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{"topics":[{"id":"5572550e636872787e1f0b00","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"Ill cnfess to you. I once worked in a butchery,msome years ago. My boss was an old irishman immigrant and my co worker was his niece, a gorgeous redhead named Rita, who spoke spanish, gaelic and english. We got along pretty good; I am a very cultivated guy and told her stories about her second country and she was fascinated. I captivated her withbthe stories of Eamon de Valera, Patrick Sarsfield, Eowin O'Duffy, Wolfe Tone, and King Brian who defeated the vikings at Clontarf and we were both catholic. While my boss liked me well enough he wasnt happy that I was getting along so well with herm I guess he thought I was hitting on her but as much as I would have liked that I was too shy for it; the important thing here is that he gave mea choice: I would limit my interactions with her to the minimum or I was fired. I was very nervous but I liked my job so I decided that to minimize the effect of my decision I would tell her that so shewouldnt think I was angry or rude. One evening when we were closing the butchery I was thinking on how to tell herwhen she began to talk and said: So, are you gay or what? \r\nI was dumbfounded and asked why did she ask that\r\nI dont want to sound cocky but I know Im pretty, no man who hasworked with me before has left without asking me out. So, are you gay? Im totally cool with that I just want to know.\r\nI laughed and answered yes, that way I could still hag with her and since she would totally tell her uncle he wouldnt suspect of me anymore.\r\nSince that night my boss never looked at me again without laughing his ass away.","author":"520901737f123b14a50000d8"},{"id":"557255ac636872392e8b0000","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"I shall be leaving shortly. Fare thee well, derplings.","author":"5007bbdf7f123b112f00023a"},{"id":"557256136368726370c11700","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@Meresflut\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/5572550e636872787e1f0b00#post_5572550e636872787e1f0b00\r\n\r\nPubertad. Gracias por hacer la vida aún más incomoda para uno de lo que por sí es, y al igual que cada candidato este domingo, Ch**** ** ***** hija de ****","author":"4fdfbf92945b7075d50036e4"},{"id":"557256406368723f8f220100","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@uc9\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/5572550c63687270555c0d00#post_5572550c63687270555c0d00\r\n[bq=\"uc9\"]HOLY FUCK!\r\n\r\nYou know how I go on and on about robots? Well almost realistic sexbots are already for sale in Japan. *Almost* realistic. You're familiar with the uncanny valley? Well the sexbots in question are almost out of the uncanny valley; you can tell that they're sexbots, but at first glance they look human. They also have realistic feeling skin.\r\n\r\nInb4 Chobits style future.\r\n\r\n*edit\r\nCorrection some of them have gotten out of the uncanny valley.[/bq]\r\nSince my post got cut off by the page.\r\n\r\nTl:dr; realistic androids and realistic sexbots are here.","author":"38b55cdf63616403d7560600"},{"id":"5572566463687214b90b0300","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@Meresflut\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/5572550e636872787e1f0b00#post_5572550e636872787e1f0b00\r\nwhy would you get that cozy with a chick just to say youre gay","author":"50a843d47f123b2e7c001359"},{"id":"557256926368726370ed1800","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@uc9\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/557256406368723f8f220100#post_557256406368723f8f220100\r\ni'd imagine that whores are better","author":"50a843d47f123b2e7c001359"},{"id":"557256b763687267528b0000","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@uc9\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/5572550c63687270555c0d00#post_5572550c63687270555c0d00\r\nI am not surprised that Japan was the first one in doing that.","author":"5239db6da4c72d22d9000358"},{"id":"557256e463687214b9f00300","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@QuasarNova\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/557256136368726370c11700#post_557256136368726370c11700\r\nPero vaya que era guapa la condenada, ahora si me arrepiento de no haber hecho la movida.\r\nEntonces qué? El verde finalmente compró tu lealtad con sus kits escolares que se rompen al tercer día y sus boletos para que vayas a ver sus spots al cone en ligar de película?","author":"520901737f123b14a50000d8"},{"id":"5572573b6368725b3d9a0100","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@uc9\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/557256406368723f8f220100#post_557256406368723f8f220100\r\nNot really that interested as is.","author":"5062d6f17f123b3e16001184"},{"id":"5572574663687263708f1a00","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@hype\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/5572566463687214b90b0300#post_5572566463687214b90b0300\r\nNo, I got cozy to tell herthe reason I was going to stop talking with her, she got me an easier way out. Although now I regret not inviting hr out. She really was gorgeous.","author":"520901737f123b14a50000d8"},{"id":"557257746368723f8f2c0300","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@Meresflut\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/557256e463687214b9f00300#post_557256e463687214b9f00300\r\n\r\n!https://media0.giphy.com/media/rXG8rnJ6hT4n6/200.gif!","author":"4fdfbf92945b7075d50036e4"},{"id":"557257ca6368726370aa1b00","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@QuasarNova\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/557257746368723f8f2c0300#post_557257746368723f8f2c0300\r\nAh Jonaj Jameson, tu siempre tienes la respuesta a todo. Y es que es verdad ¿qué queda sino reír?","author":"520901737f123b14a50000d8"},{"id":"557257fe6368726752130200","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@Meresflut\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/557257ca6368726370aa1b00#post_557257ca6368726370aa1b00\r\n\r\n¿Llorar?","author":"4fdfbf92945b7075d50036e4"},{"id":"557258b763687214b9ba0700","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@QuasarNova\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/557257fe6368726752130200#post_557257fe6368726752130200\r\nNo, comer enanos de circo sazonados en pasta de dientes después de tenerlo marinando en una solución de jugo de uva, aceite capullo y caopectate hirviendo por tres horas. \r\n","author":"520901737f123b14a50000d8"},{"id":"5572594763687246877a0500","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@Meresflut\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/557258b763687214b9ba0700#post_557258b763687214b9ba0700\r\n\r\n¿Ok, pero de cuál pasta: Colgate, Colgate White, Oral-B?\r\n\r\nAdemás, los enanos de circo estan sumamente caros desde que quitaron los animales del circo.\r\n\r\nPor cierto, gracias Partido Verde, te veo en el infierno.","author":"4fdfbf92945b7075d50036e4"},{"id":"55725a0063687214b93e0a00","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"Votare por el PT.","author":"5239db6da4c72d22d9000358"},{"id":"55725a606368726752a30400","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@QuasarNova\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/5572594763687246877a0500#post_5572594763687246877a0500\r\nPareces nuevo, obvio Crest. En cuanto al precio, no por nada se llama cocina gourmet, además ahí tienes a Margarito, de algo tiene que servir a este país además de estorbar en la fila del metro. Ah, y el caopectate debe estar caduco o añejo, total, es lo mismo.\r\nY tu que errs abogado ¿cuántas leyes electorales se pasó el verde por sus inertes y minúsculos testículos estas elecciones?","author":"520901737f123b14a50000d8"},{"id":"55725a746368724687520700","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@trashboat\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/557249b56368727add890c00#post_557249b56368727add890c00\r\nyeah but thats really easy as is and takes like 10 seconds flat to do, unless youre doing a shitton of screencaps at once then i could understand ","author":"4ffbfff37f123b072a01bb5b"},{"id":"55725a866368726370362100","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@Shadow the Hedgehog\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/55725a0063687214b93e0a00#post_55725a0063687214b93e0a00\r\nSabía que eras un comunista. Te lo dije Quasar Nova, comunista.","author":"520901737f123b14a50000d8"},{"id":"55725b5d63687214b90c0d00","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@Meresflut\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/55725a606368726752a30400#post_55725a606368726752a30400\r\n\r\nJerarquicamente esta la Constitución, obvio.\r\n Luego nos pasamos por la Ley General de Instituciones y Procedimientos Electorales, Ley General en Materia de Delitos Electorales y la Ley General de Partidos Políticos.\r\n\r\nSin contar la Constitución, existen 4 legislaciones especializadas en materia electoral y la única razón por la que no cuento la última es porque la consulta popular se compra fácil y es lo único en lo que el PV no metió mano. Hasta ahora.\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n","author":"4fdfbf92945b7075d50036e4"},{"id":"55725c6a6368726370192500","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@QuasarNova\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/55725b5d63687214b90c0d00#post_55725b5d63687214b90c0d00\r\nY cómo se llama cuándo infinges la ley regalando despensas o en su defecto tortas y chescos? ","author":"520901737f123b14a50000d8"},{"id":"55725cb063687260052c0000","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"Something random, but /v/'s reaction to x-com 2 is hilarious:\r\n!http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/974/291/bfe.png!","author":"38b55cdf63616403d7560600"},{"id":"55725cc66368725b3d470a00","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@Meresflut\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/55725a866368726370362100#post_55725a866368726370362100\r\nNo soy comunista.\r\nSimplemente no se por quien votar porque todos los candidatos son pinches rateros de miaarrda.","author":"5239db6da4c72d22d9000358"},{"id":"55725d736368723994910200","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@Shadow the Hedgehog\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/55725cc66368725b3d470a00#post_55725cc66368725b3d470a00\r\nNo te fijes, aún si fueras comunista te seguiría queriendo. Esta muy bien tener claro por quien votarás, mas aún el hechode votar. Y me alegra que nos tegsla confianza de decirnos algo tan delicado. Yo por ejemplo votaré por morena.","author":"520901737f123b14a50000d8"},{"id":"55725d946368726005120100","topic_id":"5161dd617f123bd25900013d","body":"\"@Meresflut\":/dis/the-time-wasting-thread/post/55725c6a6368726370192500#post_55725c6a6368726370192500\r\n\r\nA eso se le llama condonación del voto, según artículo 11 de la Ley Geneal en Materia de Delitos Electorales en la cual se estipula que se le condenara con imposición de doscientos a cuatrocientos días multa y prisión de dos a nueve años, al servidor público que decida condicionar la prestación de un servicio público, el cumplimiento de programas gubernamentales, el otorgamiento de concesiones, permisos, licencias, autorizaciones, franquicias, exenciones o la realización de obras públicas, en el ámbito de su competencia, a la emisión del sufragio en favor de un precandidato, candidato, partido político o coalición;a la abstención del ejercicio del derecho de voto o al compromiso de no votar a favor de un precandidato, candidato, partido o coalición.\r\n\r\nEsta claro es la versión corta del asunto.","author":"4fdfbf92945b7075d50036e4"}]} |