xesite/blog/spellblade-plans-2021-08-16.markdown

---
title: Spellblade Plans
date: 2021-08-16
series: spellblade
tags:
 - enby
 - nonbinary
---

[If you had subscribed to my <a href="https://www.patreon.com/cadey">Patreon</a>, you could have read this <a href="https://www.patreon.com/posts/spellblade-plans-54727617">a week ago></a>!](conversation://Cadey/enby)

Hey, I don't normally do this kind of thing because it impacts my productivity
for me to do it, but I'd like to detail out my plans for the novel I've been
working on off and on for almost a year.

I've wanted to write a novel for a very long time, if only to do it and have
done it and point to it on a shelf as something that I created. I have been
stuck in story hell for a while, but then inspiration struck about the time that
I realized I was nonbinary. Being nonbinary can be an odd thing for people that
aren't used to thinking about gender that way, and I wanted to play with that
idea as something the main character would live through.

In essence, Spellblade is a story about the main character Alicia coming out as
nonbinary in a world that is very polarized by gender, in this case with the
schools of spellcraft and bladecraft. Alicia is a spellblade, or a person
that stands directly in the middle of the two diametrically opposed halves
(they're more of a bladecrafter than a spellcrafter, but either way very much in
the middle).

[Correction(2021-08-16 16:54): A previous version of this article said that
Alicia was _the_ Spellblade, not _a spellblade_. Spellblades are actually not
uncommon in the world of the book, most are really just never aware of it being
a thing or are very quiet about it due to social taboo. Many people in the book
may either be a spellblade or know one without being aware of it (many
spellcrafters certainly are, but could chalk it up to luck or cross-functional
training without thinking too much about it). My aim is to have a mostly
cerebral story about gender (without overtly mentioning gender in the book
text), not tell an epic tale like Avatar: The Last Airbender. I messed
up.](conversation://Cadey/coffee)

This book is entirely a riff on gender and is a stepping stone for me to both
get better at writing and to try to convey very complicated feelings and moods
about being nonbinary in a very binary world. I forget who said this, but
someone that was once close to me said that simple phrases can only explain
simple ideas, but more complicated things require a whole novel. This is a novel
in which I try to explain the feelings and moods of being nonbinary.

That being said, this book is my first novel and as such I do not expect it to
be perfect, far from it in fact. I'm pretty horrible at longer form writing like
this. I've been learning a lot as I go along though, and I'm certain that if I
write another novel like this in the future that it will both take a lot less
time to make and likely be a lot better to boot.

As a teaser, here's something from my local drafting folder, the first scene of
the book. Enjoy!

---

Alicia scanned across the clearing. Her cat eyes darted across the field, her
ears focused forward and ready for victory. The battlefield was a wide open
grassy field without any good spots to take cover. Her team was losing. Badly.
Her team's flag was solidly in the hands of the enemy and every attempt to
wrestle it free had failed. Alicia looked over the field and got a very terrible
idea. She turned towards her friend Tistus and whispered "We're going to try a
pincer attack, when you get the flag, run like your life depends on it" into his
ear. Tistus nodded back and stretched his legs a little. Alicia told the other
group the plan via hand signals. Alicia sent the "go" signal and they all took
off sprinting.

The two groups managed to pinch the blue team together, their backs against
eachother and tails interlocking for stability. Zekas, the blue team leader with
the red team's flag loomed over red team and readied his wooden sword. His plan
almost worked, if only he wasn't struck in the back on his right side by
Alicia's matching wooden sword. Zekas dropped his sword and growled at Alicia,
baring his shark teeth to her. Tistus managed to squeeze between the other blue
team members and yanked the flag free. He held it for dear life in his claws and
gave Alicia a signal with his tail.

Alicia took a hit to the side from one of the guards she was struggling against
and a small trickle of blood started to run down her left leg. Zekas noticed
that his flag was missing and saw Alicia's cut, sending him into a rage. "You
witch, I'll kill you!". Zekas knocked Alicia to the ground with an uppercut and
Tistus sprinted off for home base while blue team surrounded Alicia. Zekas tried
to grab what he thought was the flag and got Alicia's blood on his hand. Zekas
growled again and looked around, seeing Tistus fleeing like his life depended on
it.

"AFTER THEM!"

Blue team took off and tried to catch up with Tistus, but the distraction was
long enough that his victory was all but guaranteed. The rest of red team didn't
bother to chase down blue team, they knew Tistus was the fastest sprinter at the
bladecraft school.

The horn sound resonated throughout the area. Tistus had made it to the base and
the exercise was over.

Red team had won.

Puri, one of Alicia's teammates, helped Alicia up and gave her a bandage.
Alicia dressed her wound and felt a surge of lightning race up her hand. The
exact kind of surge she didn't want to have around other people.

_No no no no no no. Focus, calm, let it drain to the lightning rod in my heart._
Alicia ran through the exercises her father told her to do and the feeling
settled. The surge had stopped, but so had the bleeding. Alicia and the rest of
her team started walking back to camp, catching up with Zekas' slow gait.

Zekas growled at Alicia in frustration, "Nice trick with that fake flag. You got
me."

"Trick? Oh, the guard to my left cut my leg with his sword. I think you got
got."

Zekas facepalmed and looked at Alicia. No real emotion, he just looked at her.
Alicia's roughly six foot snep frame. There was a trickle of blood down her left
side, but other than that her white fur and gray spots were well-kept, with her
chocolate brown hair tied into a battle bun. "Lemme see that wound."

"I'm gonna let the apothecary take a look at it, it's still hurting but I can
walk on it."

Alicia and Zekas started walking back to camp with the remnants of their teams.

Zekas laughed, "At least you didn't let that witch beat you." and he lead the
way towards the teacher's garrison.

Alicia nervously laughed back and followed suit.