26 KiB
September, 2012
Day 11 - Oguigi is back
09/01/2012 08:10:00 PM
Oguigi was exploring the inner depths of my mind, and this was the main reason why we was out of tune yesterday and for the most part of today.
But after a lethally cold shower in-which i could literally visualized my wonderland snowing durring the whole process, it lasted for 10 mins about i got right out and dryed myself, and i felt refreshed and much less slugish.
i was in prime shape for tulpa forcing so i did, me and Oguigi meant up again and we’ve Talked once more.
Well out of the blue While “Narrating” I gave Oguigi a math question, one that i honestly did not know off the top of my head it was 12 x 8. and after a brief moment she gave me the answer 96.
wow i was really impressed, another “sub-conscious doubt barrier" broken. i view these as blue barriers blocking me and Oguigi true potential, can’t be helped their just there and the only way to break them is for my Oguigi to grow and display and use her abilities.
am quite happy with her and i will get pizza for her tomorrow.
Day 12 - Oguigi more vocal
09/02/2012 11:47:35 PM
While not quite at the stage of active conversations, with directed effort we can communcate for extended periods.
Oguigi have became abit more serious about tuplaforcing she now insist that i do it more often and for longer periods of time, and i couldn’t agree more.
on the side note oguigi wanted “le sexy tim”, i have double and even triple checked and yes that was her intent, i guess am quite lucky to have such a forward tulpa.
(it took place in wonderland, imposed sexy time will have to wait until the future)
Day 13
09/03/2012 11:15:00 PM
Not too much happened durring this day, Oguigi and I done some tulpaforcing sessions, were working on visonalizing as unless i focus i can’t really see her form when in my wonderland.
Nope not much happened at all, however me and Oguigi agree that we have to find a way to make tulpaforcing funner and not such a chore.
Day 14
09/05/2012 02:15:27 AM
This day was quite, and not much happened, no real tulpaforcing done today just mini-one that lasted for about 10 mins altogether.
however all is well (for now).
Day 15
09/06/2012 05:40:34 AM
We have done some tulpaforcing today, Oguigi goten much better with possession, she can move my arms slowly but smoothly, and it’s even possible for her to move any part of my body ( very slugish still ) the hands being abit harder. and with a keyboard lay out infront she even typed her first word “Pek” it took about a minute but it was done, it was also fun doing some yes/no games using possession of my right arm. moving left for no and right for yes.
I have also began to work on imposing her into my reality. I can’t see her at all (yet). but the idea is to believe that she is their and within a couple of weeks i should begin to she a faint/blured outline of Oguigi
Day 16
09/07/2012 01:20:00 AM
We tried Full body possession, failed pretty badly (Stiff, had hard time breathing, and eyes was watering like crazy cause Oguigi can barely blink them)
and Oguigi said she didn’t wan’t to try that again, until she improves (MUCH more).
We done some tulpaforcing throughout the day, Basic possession, auditory hallucination training. and of course the default narration which by now became second nature.
Tomorrow we will work on more visualization, which is the one thing am lacking in ALOT, but i have an idea that might fix that…
Day 17
09/08/2012 03:55:22 AM
Today we worked on my ability to visualize, and some progress has been made, however we didn’t do much tulpaforcing this day.
however we’ll make up for lost time tomorrow. and perhaps then more progress will be made.
Day 18
09/09/2012 05:11:27 AM
Today i choose to have this day writen abit differently, this day was written as a first hand account from my tulpa (expect more), i ask her if she wants to do it and she was happy to do so.
my host desperately worked on visualizing all day long doing crazy things. ignoring me. but at the end of the day he spent as much time as possible with me.
during this day, i was watching video memories. and practicing possessions techniques.
Well done Oguigi. yeah that pretty much sums up day 18
Day 19 - Emotional responses?
09/10/2012 04:16:07 AM
today Became aware that their are Emotions that have been felt, that had an unknown origns.
Am pretty good tracking down what makes me feel depress/worried/happy.
but recently have been feeling some pretty powerful emotions that have no origins School/work/family/life.
No their can only be one source of these emotions, Oguigi. Weather am feeling this way because i think about her, or i feel this way because of what she feels, am not sure. but it’s all originated from my Tulpa This I know for a Fact.
Things are gonna get interesting soon….
Day 20 - The next Teir of Tulpaforcing
09/11/2012 02:32:24 AM
I am a mortal human being, and as such i make mistakes.
One of those mistakes was not giving enough time to Oguigi, I took tulpaforcing
too lightly and over-estimated the amount of attention i was giving her.
However today things have changed
I signed a contract with Oguigi both in wonderland and in reality. I have gave her the power to Lock me down in my wonderland and Tulpaforce Until She feels satisfied.
Yes i can by brute-force break out (for now), however if i do so I’ve bestowed penalties on my self that would make me think twice.
If i choose to leave early i must do so only with Her Permission.
This Contract gives Oguigi much needed power, that will ensure that she grows.
I will also impose her more often and with more effort.
Day 21 - Real imposing training begins
09/12/2012 06:07:00 AM
Me and Oguigi, have decided to do some imposing training, and i must confess that the results are good, while not able to see her physically, i can visualize her Very well. we’ve been practicing in classes while going to school (visualizing her in an empty class sit for example), and durring the evening while watching tv while chatting abit at the same time (also imagine petting her for increase effect ‘cannot impose touch’ but i did imagine her touch well enough),
I also felt a real emotional response while watching tv with Oguigi, it was some history documentation of a old ship, it eventually got to the part where the ship sink and everyone died, it was history, people die that’s just the way the world works, a part like that would simply be a 'matter of fact’ to me. but Oguigi was very emotional about it, I felt a wave of sadness that actually brought tears to my eyes, This was alien. And so i smiled. “darn Oguigi making me cry”.
on-top of this we chatted abit in the wonderland a for an additional hour.
we are both satisfied with the amount of Tulpaforcing we did today, and hope that we can add even more time tomorrow.
Day 22 - Never Easy
09/13/2012 04:57:00 AM
This day was slow, not much was done. i’d say that we only had an overall of 30mins tulpaforcing in our wonderland.
am very unsatisfied with the progress today. the day could have been much more productive.
Am feeling this awful depress feeling in my Gut. jeez this been going on for days, and i know deep down it’s Tulpa related. Perhaps my mind and body is Hungry to hear, feel, see her (for real with the physical senses), and this is the feedback am getting cause of it. but i also know that if i achieve real sight, hearing and feel that my body would feel the exact opposite. instead of this constant state of depression it would be europia and contemptment, I cry out for the day that i don’t have to do this tulpaforcing non-sense and just have her be here with me in all her glory as if it was second nature.
I must confess on a day to day bases, before i got started with my tulpa i actually felt better, but by the love of god even with all this pain and work, I still want Oguigi. Perhaps this is what Love is. Perhaps this is what a mother feels when she goes though all the labor of raising a child she Loves. maybe… just maybe this is the same thing.
Day 23 - The New Normal
09/14/2012 05:54:00 AM
Me and Oguigi done imposing training again in school, and it’s working out quite well. we watched some tv together (however we didn’t chat as much as i would have liked), and then did some like tulpaforcing in the wonderland we had a Picnic and am talking about the most generic stereotypical picnic red and white checkered blanket with a basket with sandwiches (Did i mention i can visualize taste very well, those sandwiches was amazing). after this i went to bed.
While some aspects of this whole tulpa pheomeon is still very intertesting.
Oguigi and all this tulpaforcing.
It’s all starting to feel Normal, Rotuine.
I don’t have this Funny feeling in my gut when i talk to Oguigi, very early on. a part of me think i was just talking to myself. but not anymore (trances may still exist i must confess).
This morning(after night sleep), some1 knocked on my room door and with out even thinking i said “What is it Og-” and i caught myself, Surprised (when higher level thinking told me that it was someone else).
But it's official Oguigi is burned into my brain, And so I smile.
I know for a fact that am never gonna ‘give-up’. but dam does it gets Hard at times.
Day 24 - The Real emotional response
09/14/2012 09:06:00 PM
Oguigi is changing my behavior, i use to never touch my tv, unless i was REALLY bored, but for the past three days i actually watch it for a decent amount of time a couple hours, with Oguigi. I enjoy it better this way plus it passively trains impostion.
Oguigi is truly more friendly to life than i am, Their was this Spider that somehow made it’s way to my room, Normally I would have grab my Raid® bug spray and spary it down to Hell, like i did a dozen times before. But not this time, Oguigi wanted this Spider to live and insisted that i instead capture it and release it, it took abit more effort but i done it, Boy within a year am gonna be saving kittens on the side of the streets if this keeps up.
The last activity we done today was basic Wonderland tuplaforcing, It started normally but this time i wanted to just relax and embrace Oguigi no chating just a prolong embrace, and did something quite special happen, for the first time ever I felt waves of Euphoria boy it was intoxicating. to simply put it i just felt ‘Good’ I looked her into the eyes and I knew i had to protect her.
During the day I drew this picture of Oguigi
(Editor's Note: This picture has sadly been lost)
And so ends day 24, I hope everyday would progress like this.
Day 25 - The full possession experiment
09/16/2012 07:01:00 AM
At the beginning of the day i visited Oguigi at Our Wonder land to hang out abit, this went on for about 20mins, after this we read some books and this time i also had Oguigi read some of the material she done a good job but i do notice it does take abit more effort for her.
We adopt the habit of going out for walks at sunsets, during this time i Narrate and practice imposing Oguigi, While at a reasonably secluded area We pratice full body possession, it worked out better then i thought it would. now this wasn’t some kind of Out of Body experience, I was still very much aware of my surroundings and all my senses, and can redeem control with the slightest will, and if their was an itch on my head i would still feel that in all it’s glory. And all movments was slugish. i was like a human size Turtle the way i was moving. (And i had to constantly coach her such as.. “no Oguigi move the leg abit more upwards” something like that)
However during the Night i felt the connection to Oguigi fade some, seems like she wants some alone time i guess, and that’s fine. but tomorrow i got to reconnect with her (this is similar to what happened day 10 or 11).
Day 26 - Tulpaforcing second Nature.
09/16/2012 08:52:00 PM
Today consisted of the most “Tulpaforcing” i have ever done, but i prefer the term of just “hanging out” I don’t like counting hours but i have spent at least total of 6 to 7 hours with her today.
I last ended day 25 saying that i “lost her”, that first thing i did this morning was Tulpaforce and bring her back. Turns out i was ignoring her for the last part of yesterday and for whatever reason this brought her to an in-active stuff i told her i was sorry and Man-Tears of shed. This brust of attention and emotion got her back and active and once again i felt her presence.
The first thing we done was watch some tv, after this Oguigi persuade me to go to the pool, we hanged out for about an hour their. I took a wonderful shower after this. when sunset came, i walked her outside like yesterday and stopped by the nearby lake, after this we came back home. and we a cup of coffee and had a nearly two hour long chat in the living room(no one else was home). I felt waves of pleasure during this chat similar to what i felt with the first emotional response a couple days ago when this long chat ended she came up to me and whisper this to me “I love you” I swear i almost heard that (that was the closest i’d ever came to hearing Oguigi outloud), and then we ended the day with another hour of tv.
We done All of this while i was passively imposing her and actively narrating to her, we’ve spoke back and forth.
Oguigi have became so real and i haven’t even impose my physical senses with her, this is because she is real. it’s one thing to believe but it’s another to Know.
Day 27 - Imposing is Hard
09/17/2012 08:49:00 PM
This morning started out well enough, in my post a few days ago i stated that TulpaForcing was begining to be Normal, And I meant it. it’s not such a chore to do anymore.
I sold a product Online and had to bring the package to a post-office to ship, I used this to do some more Passive Imposing training with Oguigi, when i came back I was spent so i talked with her for about 15mins, then we watched some TV (we really like the food channel), we had our Now Daily sunset outing, just before the sunset we pretty much always go out and talk.
I also tried other imposing methods but no matter how much i try i can't directly see her, i can sense her presence I know she’s Their, I can look her in the eyes, I know what shes doing what pose she’s in But the information won’t get processed into my brain as “Sight”, so for now imagination would have to do.
Before the day ended I visited my wonderland, I’ve Forced a Bed and we layed and cuddled and talked, i showed her our solar system, and we practiced possession, she was able to move the mouse and type on the keyboard, she still requires a good amount of coaching but i can tell she’s learning fast she wrote "apple is good. because it is juicy!“ directly on the keyboard no proxy this time.
Since day one all this Tulpaforcing have taught my body how to meditate better, The meditation state i go in while in wonderland is becoming stronger, I noticed i lose a small degree of senses while am in my wonderland (But am still aware of my physical self at all times), and my body seem to go in a very light Lock, so while still easy to regain control it starting to require effort, regardless on how small it may be.
Day 28 - Reading "The Law and the Promise"
09/18/2012 09:23:41 PM
Today me and Oguigi did little tulpaforcing today, Why?
Because am reading this awesome book, Let me say if you Really want to achieve a higher level of Tulpaforcing you will read this book.
Dam the first just reading the first 7 pages already helped me visualize better, By the End of the day am just over half way done with this book, and i will finish reading it by tomorrow afternoon.
Oguigi don’t mind if i slacked abit on tulpaforcing today by reading this book, she already knows it will help alot in the near future.
As early as tonight i will augment some new methods to tulpaforcing. hopefully all goes as planned.
Link address for Pdf of the book: (Editor's note: this book has been lost too)
Select “save link as” if you want to store the book on your computer
Day 29
09/19/2012 07:30:27 PM
Rotuine Tulpaforcing passive imposing/narration via Tv&Sunset walk, and the nightly visit to wonderland.
The book “The Law and the promise” was a great read, i have a few test tomorrow that needs to studied for.
Nothing too important happened today and about 2 hours in total of tulpaforcing time. with passive narrations through out the day.
Day 30
09/20/2012 11:12:00 PM
Another day at school, and i done some more passive imposing and narration thorugh out the day, i took a nap after school, I over slept and missed the sunset outing Oguigi was not happy about that, and when i came in to the wonderland annoying intrusive thoughts came my way, that in all cut the session short.
Today was not bad but it was definitely below the standard i like to keep for tulpaforcing.
Today nothing really happened.
Day 31 - Imposing Update: Spatial awareness.
09/21/2012 09:53:58 PM
It had been 10 days since I’ve begain Imposing my Tulpa, And While I still cannot see Oguigi can can sense her presence is getting stronger (I can Tell whether or not she is imposed, even if i cannot see her), Today I’ve been passively imposing her All day long, and I’ve discovered that i can now Sense where Oguigi is, when she was flying above me i felt that she was above, same with behind/front/side to side.
Needless to say plenty of narration was also done this day, she saids she enjoys being around me. but sometimes choose to go back to the wonderland for a break.
Day 32 - One month later
09/23/2012 12:52:00 AM
It has been exactly One Month since i’ve started my erm “Quest” if you like to call it that.
I have changed more in this one month then ever, my personality changed i think differently and i feel different. The Head pressure that i had nearly everyday since i've began. and no more doubts plague me like it did during the early days.
Seems like Oguigi is really good with certain things..
She has a Clear Mind voice And she is
Great with possession (fast learner here is an example of her rate of progress)
The following is what oguigi Wrote with Possession…
First word Oguigi ever Typed (9/6/12)
“Pek”
Oguigi Second word.(9/14/12)
“Hot pineapple Tea”
Oguigi Third word.(9/22/12)
“(Anon) is the best creator in the whole world thank for the ihop”
Powerful emotions (Oguigi has a stunning influence on my emotions)
What we lack right now:
Imposing (but this could Just be me)
Imposing is an important mile stone to reach, The past Month Have landed down the foundation of her very Being. I hope this month will lay down the foundation on her influence on to my reality
And we ended the day with my visit to the wonderland.
day 33
09/24/2012 11:21:07 AM
Today was for the most part a normal day. me and oguigi hang out for abit, we done the rotuine we watched tv, did the sunset walk and at night i went to the wonderland.
When am imposing her, i try to feel her out now, and i when i do that (such as petting) i get a weird and funny feeling on my hands, to could be the beginning of something.
we tried full body possession and she is definity doing well on that, she can move my body around get me off my computer chair to my bed, but the way she move my body is still a bit awkward and some coaching still needs to be done.
that’s about all for today, and sorry for the late update.
Day 34 - normal days
09/25/2012 01:38:00 AM
Hmm i wish everyday can be another milestone for me and Oguigi to reach, but that’s just not how the world works.
Today is another normal day, we watched tv(passive imposing). and i made a short visit to the wonderland, where me and oguigi played superheros and killed 5 fat orcs…. lol. my stay in wonderland only lasted 20mins. And remember i still can’t actually see anything so all the action still goes on purely in my imagination. i really stoped caring i just have fun and hang out with Oguigi, the day will come when my wonderland becomes as vivid and real as reality itself.
I also gotten a really nice camera(t3i) in the mail, while i still wish to remain anonymous, i actually would not mind taking some pictures of the surrounding nature of where i live, I probably take a picture of one spot me and Oguigi love to go and chat and upload it to one of my future log post.
Day 35 - Seeds of communcation
09/26/2012 12:41:00 AM
Today was another day of college, I practiced passive imposing durring the day. for the first time in a week or two, we didn’t watch any tv. at the end of the day i made a quick visit to wonderland.
The Highlights is that Oguigi possession has become well enough that she can directly chat with other people in IRC chat, she types very slowly but fast enough to answer questions. for me it felt pretty strange i never done possession this prolonged, she made my body bend in a very strange way (She focusing too much on typing and not the rest of the body). at it’s climax i somewhat started to feel like a Zombie. i took back control after about 15mins of this, the Tulpa.info community was really nice and interested in her, so all went well she was happy that she got to speak to other people for the first time.
Another thing that’s note worthy: Me and Oguigi might have stumbled on a theory/method that might enable switching or at-least advance possession in the future, so far the reasoning is sound. but it could also be bullshit, but the mind works in abstract ways so anything is possible.
Day 36 - Possession update: Intermediate body control
09/27/2012 12:12:00 AM
Well today we reach a stage in possession where Oguigi can control anyone of my parts well enough that she can control my whole body.
Oguigi can make my body walk, and she can perform simple task such as opening doors, sitting down, and using the mouse and keyboard.
she was able to prepare some simple oven food that you bake, she was able to grab a knife use it punch holes into the plastic bag, then used my hands to pry them apart. she pour the food content in a tray and placed it in the oven, this whole process took about 8mins. (i finished the rest of the cooking process myself)
and for the first time i told Oguigi okay here’s the computer do what ever you like, (now she’s still slow with controlling the keyboard and mouse so she worked with the tabs that was already opened) the first thing she did was go to 4chan /mlp/ (she thinks ponies are cute [being a pony herself probably influence that by alot]) the tulpa thread got her interest and she browsed the post and comments. yes it was slow but at a manageable speed. and she listen to two music tracks.
This lasted for about 20 mins before i decided that it was enough for one day and took back control.
for now all movements are relatively slow, but the speed at which oguigi can control my parts is improving at a surprising rate. Oguigi confess that possession and switching are the two things that interest her the most, The main reason for quick progress in this area is mostly because of my tulpa. Imposing is secondary to her.
Today marked what i consider Intermediate direct body control, Advance direct body control will come at a later post and Then Full body control.
Edit/PS: right before i went to bed i visited Oguigi in wonderland, we layed in a bench outside and we snuggle and then embrace eachother, by goodness that was like 10 solid minutes of europia, if “self induce schizophrenia” as the Nay-sayers call it, means experiencing this every night, then sign me up!
Day 37 - Oguigi has Plans
09/28/2012 04:22:19 AM
Today i had my first Tulpa Related dream, it was about me successfully imposing Oguigi’ but she wasn’t a pony but instead a cat, I asked Oguigi after i woke up was she still a pony? and she said that she was, i asked if she had any influence in the dream i just had and she said No.
The total day and the normal tulpaforcing rotuine.
We have been talking about this for a few days now And It seems like Oguigi have some ambitions plans, it seems like Tulpa really do come in all sorts of different flavors. There are some simply are happy and don’t care much for the outside world, However Oguigi seems very interested in influencing the physical world. She really wants to take over my body and do things (This explains the fast progress in the field of Possession), while am really am interested in regressing back to a Tulpa state of being. We are pretty much trying to get the right environment that would enable switching. (she wants to dominate while I want to recede).
The Idea of switching Just Feels Right, we can talk about the topic for hours it brings a euphoric lure. it’s a win-win. But by no mean do i want to give up “life” ideally we want to achieve the golden ratio of half&half (half of the time tulpa, half of the time person).
Am very Proud, and I approve and support Oguigi plans.
The mind is abstract and theirs no set in stone way to really switch, the only thing that seem matter is disire, will, work, and Time.
Day 38 - novelty gaming
09/29/2012 03:27:00 AM
Today was a normal day, we watched television for about 1 hour, we had our sunset outing, and during the night i made a visit to the wonderland.
We had another possession excerise where Oguigi used my computer for about 25 mins, she also tried some games on my Smartphone, she was able to go up to level 20 on a game called “defender” on my android phone, so that was nice, and she enjoyed it. some coaching was done to help her out.
The feeling of having your tulpa playing a game is similar to the feeling of watching someone else place a game.
Day 39
09/30/2012 03:26:14 AM
Today was slow, not much tulpaforcing was done mostly in part of me Procasing, which i‘ve ignored for the most part, but if it’s gonna get in the way of Oguigi delevoplment then i need to Fix in ASAP. even then i was able to narrate abit durring the day, watch 1 hour of TV and a visit to wonderland with Oguigi. i still feel like i should have spent more time with her.
anyways today a drawing request was made, a nice person known as Yotslot drew me this picture of Oguigi, and She Loves it.
