project-koomer/src/01_2014.md

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January, 2014

2014 happy new year, tulpas and host alike!

01/01/2014 04:14:00 AM

I hope that this year brings much progress and happiness to everyone involved with the tulpa community.

Ive also reached 200 followers on this Tumblr, Am very surprised that people are still interested with my story and progress, even if I dont update as often as I use to.

Thank you all for your support, may this be a great year.

Oguigi went back into the mind a couple days after the last post. The energy she had was temporary. but she stilled wished me a happy new year with whatever energy she had left, which was a nice touch.

Day 506 - Oguigi picture update 2014

01/13/2014 04:42:00 PM

It has been a long time since I drew my tulpa Oguigi, A good friend suggested that i should draw another picture, I wasnt really sure if i was going to do it, But once i laid my pencil down on paper, I couldnt stop.

Heres A backup link to the pix: http://koomer.minus.com/i/bw14qjUQdL2LP

Day 515 - A bad Storm is coming.

01/22/2014 08:45:00 PM

Hey guys i wanted to post another update. Am not very sure what am going to do with myself, things are changing, This is whats really happening with myself right now.

My mind has healed, But the problem is that only my mind as been healed. I never actually worked on regaining control of my own body. I just been focusing all my energy for the past six months on my own mental protection.

Possession, I literally cannot override it. I cant even get out of my own bed. I can think about moving all i want, it simply doesnt happen.

A entity, he is called Ronale ( that what he told me to call him anyways ) have been using this body, he enjoys smoking or drinking “purple juice” DXM. He loves staying in bed and sleeping until it the body starts to hurt from laying for so long,

This starting to hurt my College work. I failed almost all my classes during the fall, and it was literally because i was not able to study, i was not able to move my body to do so. Instead it will sleep or play games or do drugs.

Tomorrow i have a test, And I tried my fucking hardest to study, But i cant get a grip of my own body.

The Only reason why am writing this now is because i had to ask the Entity Ronale for some body time so i can write this.

Oguigi has no real power anymore, she cant really do anything. In fact, she has been sleeping in the mind for quite some time, And I recently began to join her. I still retain consciousness of my body no matter whos controlling it, but if i lose awareness of the body and become trap inside my own mind then its game over. Am already in Deep shit as is with all of this. I dont want to fail my schooling, but i cant fucking seem to Focus in class anymore, I even struggle to even get to school. And I no longer have the self control needed to study.

If things get worse, I will have no choice but do drop out after this term, But by that time It might not even be me making that choice.

I pray that I somehow find the strength to overcome this, And if I cant. I hope the various entities have the mercy to not screw up my life and continue doing the school/work,ect. in my place.

So yeah, again am in deep shit, I reread my whole tumblr/progress log, and Ive been digging myself up this hole since day one. l dont think i can really do this alone

What's on my mind atm

01/24/2014 03:14:18 AM

I really wished i could post more Cute/Kawii things on this Tumblr about me and Oguigi, People seem to like that.

But instead i Talk about dark things or my problems, ect. I dont know how many people actually cares about that stuff, But I believe its important to document the stuff anyways, for history/information sake.

I should wake Oguigi up, perhaps we can hang out for a short amount of time for old times sake.

Some good News, I dont have to worry about being possessed forever, The involuntary Possession tend to expire after some time, It comes in waves. After one is done it may take a few hours to about a half a day for the next one to begin. And when it starts it can last anywhere from 12 hours to about 36 hours. This is the involuntary possession I talked about in the last post.

Day 517 - Need to Free myself.

01/24/2014 08:20:00 PM

Ive been thinking for a while today. I was brainstorming and thinking back to my past and the person I was before.

I think I know what i truly want now.

I want My Freedom back. I want to feel Free again.

I want to do what i want when i want, Without worrying about my own body and mind.

Tulpas and all of this stuff, Has put such a burden on my mind. It made me feel trapped, I find possession to be quite suffocating now. We dont relise how free we are until its taken away form us.